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Black and foul,
With steaming taint,
The liquid in my mug

Offends me much.
It's taste is such
It brings to mind a slug

Whose slimy trail
Does now entail
To gather at my lips.

It makes me ill,
This swirling swill
I drink with grueling sips,

This fetid funk
This juice of skunk
That doth insult my tongue.

A troll's pit sweat
Or closer yet
The essence of dog dung

Or toxic waste
Would better taste
Than this revolting brew,

And yet, alas,
I'm such an ass.

To go without won't do.
Um...yeah. Not too fond of the company's coffee. I'm strongly considering taping this up next to the pot. :plotting:

DAMN YOU MASTER CHEF!!! :shakefist:
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:iconprettycrazy:
PrettyCrazy Featured By Owner Jun 7, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
LOL.
Reply
:iconthe-sky-is-the-limit:
the-sky-is-the-limit Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
tea>coffee :P
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2009  Student General Artist
:)
Iced tea. A lot of hot teas remind me of bath tub water. I'm weird. :shrug:
A belated thanks for the fave btw. ;)
Reply
:iconthe-sky-is-the-limit:
the-sky-is-the-limit Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
lol,

you are welcome!
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2009  Student General Artist
;P
Reply
:iconbowofanariel:
BowofAnariel Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2009
:iconcoffeeplz:
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009  Student General Artist
Wow. That looks waaaaay nicer than what we've got. :(
Reply
:iconbowofanariel:
BowofAnariel Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009
:pat: good coffee at home?
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009  Student General Artist
Yes. Come over and share a cup? :)
Reply
:iconbowofanariel:
BowofAnariel Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009
sure :meow:
Reply
:iconalois-noette:
Alois-Noette Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2009
"I'm such an ass"? :confused: Meaning stubborn, right?

Anyways. The wording is delightfully nasty, and you rhymed well.
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009  Student General Artist
Stubborn in drinking the sludge, and foolish to. A slave to the pot! ahahaha....:confused:
Reply
:iconalois-noette:
Alois-Noette Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009
:)
Reply
:iconlordbeazy:
lordbeazy Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2009
Well I was gonna ask you round for coffee, but damn, I lost the pot!
An amusing tale of woe, wars have been fought over less! Nice one. :)
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009  Student General Artist
Well, as long as you haven't succumbed to MASTER CHEF!!! :shakefist: I'd love to. :flirty:

It really is brackish sludge. And yes. Makes me wonder if the Boston Tea Party was REALLY about taxes. :plotting:
Reply
:iconlordbeazy:
lordbeazy Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009
Well if you guys hadn't thrown our tea overboard, you wouldn't be drinkin crap coffee!! :D
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009  Student General Artist
Ah. And now we learn the Truth! We should have never fought the British! :faint:

...;P
Reply
:iconlordbeazy:
lordbeazy Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009
Too true, our Knights were better than your Knights, cept when they were drunk! :D
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009  Student General Artist
Yes yes... Everyone looks quite fetching in red. We still sent you packing though! :nana:
Reply
:iconlordbeazy:
lordbeazy Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009
Only becoz we heard that one day, Mr Bush wud be in charge!!! :D
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2009  Student General Artist
Ah. Too true. :no: Fine fine. You win THIS round. :shakefist:
Reply
:iconrachel-rhapsody:
rachel-rhapsody Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2009
i loved the poem, and laughed rather loudly when i read the author's comments.
you definitely should stick it up.
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009  Student General Artist
:) I did. Only a few people noticed though. :roll: I swear, the best place to hide something's in plain view. :P

And thanks. I'm glad. :D
Reply
:iconrachel-rhapsody:
rachel-rhapsody Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009
hahah good on you.
oh tell me about it. my brother had a tantrum yesterday because he couldn't find his hockey socks. he was screaming and throwing things and i'm like,
"Ruarai, they're on you're bed"
and he's like
oh.
pretty funny.

you're welcome also.
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2009  Student General Artist
Could have been worse. Could have been in his hand. I've done THAT before. :roll: sheesh.
Reply
:iconviddax378:
Viddax378 Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2009
Smite the disgusting coffee of the flavour transgressers! Sounds better as a fuel for a machine not a human being. :o
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009  Student General Artist
Oh My GOD. They're ALL robots. :O That explains EVERYTHING!!!

.... oh wait... no... no it doesn't...
Reply
:iconviddax378:
Viddax378 Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009
Some stuff? But you said you were a robot but if you were you'd like the coffee. Aha! i have you now! :sherlock:
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009  Student General Artist
unless I'm just trying to throw you off... :plotting:
Reply
:iconviddax378:
Viddax378 Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009
Throw me off where? you don't have a high enough tower:evillaugh:
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009  Student General Artist
You're right! 0_0
I'll work on that!
Reply
:iconviddax378:
Viddax378 Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2009
I'll "help". <gives you a brick, you put it on a wall, runs round and pulls out same brick, hands you brick> repeat until nothing is achieved.
Reply
:iconvetchvespers:
VetchVespers Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2009  Student General Artist
I LIKE your work ethic sir!
Reply
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